Peer Relationships Affect Family Interactions

Racheal Koole

By Racheal Koole
The tears stroll down as the screaming never ceases. The yells hurt deep down as both people decide to walk away from the hurtful experience. Later, one word from someone else sets the emotions off once again. The yelling starts again, but with a different person and different words.

There are always problems going on in the world. Relationships crumble and the emotions from other experiences carry on into different relationships. It is hard for teens to have great relationships, but teenagers have two different lives: family life and social life. People think that the two lives hardly ever cross, but really they conflict more than the average person thinks.

“I can get into an argument with someone and I won’t necessarily be in a bad mood, but when someone, for example my grandmother says something, in my opinion, pointless, I might get a little irritated,” said junior Jolanda Sloan. “I always regret my reaction, but I suppose that’s just life. Everyone has emotions and we shouldn’t hide them.”

Andrew Fuligni, a University of California, Los Angeles psychiatry professor at the Semel Institute for Neuroscience and Human Behavior, conducted an experiment to find how arguments with friends affect arguments with family.

The conclusion was that arguments with friends did effect the relationship with family. According to UCLA Health, teens had more problems with family when they argued with friends than if they did not, and vice versa.

“Family fights seemed to last longer as well; the affect of family conflict spilled over into peer relationships the next day and two days later, while peer conflict only affected fights at home on the following day,” reported UCLA Health.

Sloan believes it is true that emotions will carry on to family.

“When fighting with a friend, you usually hold a grudge and it can’t just disappear all of a sudden when speaking with your parents, for example,” said Sloan.

This conclusion is not always the case for every teen, however. Loy Norrix sophomore Vicktoria Pashby believes she hardly gets mad and it rarely carries over to her family.

“Some teens fight with their friends and family while others rarely do. Some spill their emotions out on family while others just keep it in. It’s different for everyone and everyone expresses their emotions differently no matter what affects them,” said Pashby.

There are many other views on this conclusion. Senior Yahayra Martinez agrees with the result and experiences this herself.

“Let’s say you have an argument with peers you stay mad awhile . . . your parents ask how your day went and it’ll pop out,” said Martinez.

The Huffington Post posted a poll on their website about this outcome. The question was “Does Your Family Life Affect Your Relationship?” Fifty percent of the people reported that yes family does affect other relationships. Twelve percent reported that there is no affect and the two lives remain separate. The other 37.5 percent said that the affect is hard to say and the outcome depends on the situation.
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